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Tag Archives: Chevy Account

Becoming A Non-Person

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Posted on October 8, 2013

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Thanksgiving of 1977 was particularly festive…despite the Lions being drubbed by Walter Payton and the Bears 31-14 in the Thanksgiving Day Game. My wife and I had told our families about the impending move to LA, but no one else. We put our house up for sale, but couldn’t put the “For Sale” sign in the lawn yet, as we didn’t want to raise any suspicions. A co-worker lived a block away. Being a short-timer also allowed me to laugh off the craziness.  President Gerald Ford’s son, Jack, was a rep for Rolling Stone Magazine.  He called on me one day to pitch Chevy on appearing in the publication. We talked about the need to attract younger Screen Shot 2013-10-08 at 1.05.11 PMbuyers and, since we were both from political families, we talked a lot of politics. Jack put together a proposal for Chevrolet to appear in the magazine.  I reviewed it and forwarded it, with my thoughts, to our media department for their analysis. About three hours later, I got a call to come down to my boss’s office. When I entered I saw a stack of memos on his desk.  Account Men develop a keen ability to read upside down, allowing me to see that the memos, and the attached proposals, were the ones I had sent out that morning. “What the Hell do you think you’re trying to pull?” he bellowed. “Rolling Stone is a stinking, commie-pinko drug rag that is trying to destroy the youth of America!” I countered by telling him that I didn’t think Gerald Ford would allow his son to work for a stinking, commie-pinko drug rag. That didn’t work. “Cavanagh, I’ve retrieved every single copy of your memo.  From now on, you check with me before sending out a memo like this.” I clicked my heels and smiled. “Jawohl, Herr Kommandant,” I said under my breath. This didn’t bother me at all. I knew that Mazda would soon be getting my proposal.

Fall of 1977 had been quite pleasant. Mostly crisp and clear, with a few gentle rains. Goodbye snow tires and salt stains on your shoes. Actually, the salt is called halite, the mineral rock form of sodium chloride. Everyone living in a snow climate stocks up on it to de-ice their driveways and front walks to keep the U.S. Postal Service lawsuits down. Anyone unfortunate enough to get caught behind a highway department truck spraying halite knows what it’s like to be strafed. Bad weather wasn’t supposed to hit Michigan until after January 1. December 8, 1977, dawned clear and cold. By 11:30 that morning, there were a few clouds rolling in. I took a Chevy client to lunch at The Recess. I had less than two weeks until I was done. The car companies had a wonderful policy of giving their white-collar workers the same benefits the UAW negotiated for the blue-collar workers.  This meant that all of our clients were gone on vacation between Christmas and New Year.  The agency gave the same vacation to everyone working on the Chevy account.  It was better to send us home than leave us to our own mischief Office-Christmas-party-001while the client was gone and there was nothing to do. And, 1977 was a Quadruple Jackpot Bonus year. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day fell on a Saturday and Sunday.  The same was true for New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day! This meant that the vacation time for Christmas was moved to Thursday and Friday, 12/22 and 12/23. Everyone took off after the office closed on 12/21…meaning that because of impromptu office parties, nothing got done that day. My client and I took our seats at a table that had a great view of the GM Building across the street. Unfortunately, the sun was right in my client’s face, so I closed the curtain. It was a good, three martini lunch. We’d been there for about two and a half hours when our waiter came to our table. “Gentlemen,” he said, “it’s been snowing for the last hour and a huge blizzard is on its way.  We’re closing so we can get home.” I opened the curtain and could only see white.  The GM Building was nowhere to be seen. Nuts!!!! Twelve days from a clean get-away.

I raced back to a rapidly emptying office. The major streets were already clogged with traffic. I grabbed my coat and ran to the parking lot behind the Fisher Building. Because I no longer had a free car, I no longer had free parking and had to park outside with the normal people. The parking lot was a sea of identical white mounds. Which mound was covering my car? I found it on the fifth try. It was a heavy, wet snow. The kind that stuck to your windshield and would freeze there if you didn’t keep Snowyour wipers on. I thought that I could avoid the gridlock on Woodward by taking side streets up through Highland Park. It was now 5 PM, and very dark. Apparently a lot of other people were as clever, because the Highland Park side streets were jammed too. It took me over seven hours to get home. This includes the three hours I spent waiting to buy a new battery after trekking about a mile in knee-deep snow to find an open gas station.  Get me out of here!!!

The morning of January 3, 1978, finally arrived. I had typed up three copies of my resignation letter, including the “two-week” notice. I wasn’t worried that they might keep me on.  I was more concerned with my well-being once the word got out. I hitched up my pants, took a deep breath, and headed to mahogany row to drop my bomb. As I entered the corridor, I was surprised to see two of my co-workers queuing up in front of their bosses’ offices. We looked at each other with a knowing look. We were all about to become non-persons. I I Quitentered my boss’s office. Knowing how he reacted to the Rolling Stone’s thing, I wasn’t sure how he would react. He looked up and said, “Yes?” I handed him my letter. He opened it, read it, and rose from his desk.  “You S.O.B.!!” He came around the desk toward me. I assumed the Rabid Stork defensive pose. He thrust out his hand.  “Tom, congratulations! Where are you gong?” he asked. I told him. He smiled. “Good for you. All the best to you, you lucky devil.” I told him I had two more letters.  One for the Car Account Management Supervisor, and one for the Personnel Director. “Hey, I’ll do that for you.  Get back to your office and start packing. When they find out you’re going to work on Mazda, they’re going to make you clear out immediately.” I took his advice and went back to start packing. I told the folks I worked with every day. That was the toughest part. It took me an hour to put my stuff into boxes. I received a call from Personnel telling me that my final checks would be sent to me. I was informed that there would be no exit interview. I stepped out of the office and headed to the men’s room when I ran into Paul John, the EVP – Account Director, and his posse. “Hey, Cavanagh,” he said. I understand that you’re leaving for the land of fruit and nuts. You’ll fit right in!” He turned to his posse to elicit a reaction. They slowly started laughing as the herd moved on down the hall. The process of becoming a non-person had begun. When I got back to my office, I called Office Services to request a hand truck and some help taking my stuff out. They said they’d get right on it. I sat down at my now empty desk, and began making phone calls.  One went to Denny Remsing at FCB/H, telling him to beware, I was on my way. I called some of my media friends and thanked them for their friendship. I called Tom Boyle, the Small Car Ad Manager, and a good friend. He laughed and said, “You’re still here?  We’ve already been told.  They said that you’d left the building already.  Let’s stay in touch.” One of the other Account Men, Chuck Seibert, came by my office. “You’re still here?” he asked. “I would have split long ago.” I told him that I was waiting for Office Services. “How long ago did you call?” I realized that it had been over an hour. I called them back and was told that since I was no longer an employee of Campbell-Ewald, I couldn’t use any of their services. Chuck could tell from the look on my face that something was wrong. “What’s going on?” he asked. I told him and he exploded. “Those **&%^$ #$@^&! Tom, go get your car and meet me in front of the GM Building in fifteen minutes.” I asked why.  “Just do it,” he said. I grabbed my coat and went to fetch my car.  There used to be stretch of curb in front of the building that was reserved for GM heavyweights to get into their waiting cars. I availed myself of that space. Shortly after I pulled up, Chuck came flying out of themob mentality building, pushing a hand truck loaded with my stuff.  He ran up to the door. We started throwing boxes in the back seat. When we were done, he said, “Go! Go! Go!” As I sped away, I looked in the rear view mirror and saw the angry mob spill out of the building onto West Grand Boulevard. I had escaped and was on my way to start my new life.

Next:  Catastrophes That Weren’t My Fault

 

Categories: Advertising, Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Christmas, Los angeles Tags: Advertising, Blizzard, Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Chevy Account, Christmas, Detroit, FCB/H, General Motors, Gerald Ford, GM Building, Los Angeles, Michigan, Personnel, Rolling Stone

Onion Soup

2 Comments
Posted on September 26, 2013

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We left San Dimas a better place.  No Chevettes were injured in the filming of the commercial. I, however, had to do some serious damage control. Friends, family, neighbors, and real estate people were told that the whole Parker/Datsun thing was a false alarm. Time to make the best of the approaching Michigan winter. One of the great things about being the “Small Car Guy” was the opportunity to work on Corvette. Corvette!!!! The love child of Martin Milner and George Maharis. The name carried great cache. At a cocktail party, casually dropping the fact that you “did” Corvette advertising was like saying that you were the manager of The Rolling Stones. Originally designed by the legendary Harley Earl, the Corvette was introduced in 1953 at the New York Motorama. A young engineer named Zora Arkus-Duntov saw it there, falling in love with the design, but being disappointed with what was under the skin. He wrote GM, offering some ideas.  They hired him, and Zora became know as the “Father of the Corvette.”

Corvette’s 25th Anniversary was approaching. A special edition 1978 Corvette was already booked as the Pace Car of the Screen Shot 2013-09-26 at 4.21.21 PM1978 Indy 500. We were going to produce a magazine ad commemorating the anniversary. The headline was “25 Years Of Men, Machines And Memories.” We shot the very first Corvette parked next to the current model. Knowing that there were a lot of rabid Corvettophiles out there, we had Chevy’s product specialists go over the artwork, checking its technical accuracies. Sure enough, within a week of the ad appearing, the Chevy Ad Department forwarded to me a nasty letter from  self-styled “Corvette expert.” “You idiots,” the letter said, “the ’53 Corvette only had two convertible top tie-down buckles, the Corvette you show has four! You goofed.” Hhmmm. Pretty sure that the Chevy product specialists knew their stuff, but I had to respond to the letter. I called one of the specialists, who suggested that I go to the horse’s mouth. He gave me Zora Arkus-Duntov’s home phone number. Zora had retired from Chevy two years earlier, so I didn’t know whether he wanted to be bothered. I called, and he answered. He explained, “Tom, the ad’s correct. The very first production models had four. We found out that we could use only two and save a few cents about thirty vehicles in to the initial production run. In fact, they borrowed that car from me for the shoot.” I expressed my thanks and told him about the nasty letter. “Tom,” he said, “give him my home number. I’ll talk to him.” I did. And he did.

There were also some great large-scale media lunches. CBS Spot Radio Sales would have great lunches at The Recess Club. KNX would bring in their on-air celebrity,Chef Mike Roy, to prepare an incredible meal. I got word that Sunset Magazine was going to do an industry luncheon in Detroit. I called a friend back in LA who was a Sunset mag rep to confirm the cooking-crab-toppicrumor. The Sunset lunches in LA were legendary. They consisted of all the Dungeness crab, sourdough bread, caesar salad, and California chardonnay you could consume. They were bringing this Bacchanal to The Raleigh House on Telegraph. I made a simple request: can you get me on the Detroit invite list? No problem! I brought Gary Anderson, another Account Man, with me. Gary’s father had been one of my first Chevy Field clients. By the time we got out to The Raleigh House in Southfield, there weren’t many tables left.  I chose a table near the kitchen were Gary and I would be the only two seated there. The all-you-can-out lunch surpassed my wildest hopes. After the Sunset speechifying, people began to drag themselves back to their cars. I told Gary to wait a few moments. Our waiter had been a kindly, elderly gentlemen. I called him over. “Sir,” I said, “do you know if they have any “extra” crab in the kitchen?” He told me that Sunset had vastly over-ordered on the number of meals, and the staff was wondering what to do with the leftovers. I gave him a $10 bill and asked him if he could grab a couple of crabs for us. About ten minutes later he reappeared with two 33-gallon garbage bags full of crab and bottles of chardonnay. Gary and I casually walked out of The Raleigh House with large bags slung over our shoulders. I still love Sunset Magazine!

The Recess Club was nestled across the street from the GM Building, in the Fisher Building. It was a very nice social/dinner Screen Shot 2013-07-29 at 9.38.53 AMclub that every young Account Man was expected to join. Serving lunch and dinner in the main dining room, it was a great place for client lunches or dinner before seeing a play at the Fisher Theater. The real attraction, however, was the Men’s Grill. The ultimate man cave. No women allowed. Upon entering, one was wrapped in the sweet aromas of cigarettes, cigars, spilled beer, and juicy cheeseburgers.  A pool table dominated the center of the eating area. A wonderfully stocked bar was against the left wall. A carefully-timed arrival would reveal a mag rep waiting to buy a client, any 600full-william-s.-burroughsclient, a drink. Against the far wall of the grill was the door to the health club. There, the iron fingers of masseur Henri Nussbaum could knead away the tensions of a creative presentation gone bad. There was a steam room where one could find out more about a GM client than necessary. The exercise machines helped work off the aggression that, if displayed at a meeting, could abruptly truncate a career.  The real center of business, however, was the card table next to the bar.

One evening I made the mistake of going into the men’s grill after work. My wife was going to dinner and a movie with friends, so I thought I’d grab a burger and a beer, and watch the Tigers. As I entered, I heard the cry, “Hey Tom, come over here and sit with us.” It was Dick O’Neil, the SVP-Management Supervisor on the car account. He was sitting at a table with what could be called the all-star line-up of GM ad and marketing heavy breathers. Dick introduced me around. “This is great!” I thought. Dick said, “Come on, sit and play cards with us.” It was then I noticed that they were playing gin rummy.  I know how to play gin rummy, but I’d rather play with undetonated hand grenades. But, I couldn’t pass up this chance to rub elbows with raw power. The bartender came up to our table. “Another round, gents?” he asked. Dick said yes. “Tom, do you want some onion soup?” Well, I was going to have a hamburger, but soup sounded good. “Sure,”drunk-businessman I said. Five minutes later the bartender returned, carrying six glasses (more like large bowls) of vodka, each containing about eight cocktail onions.  Onion soup!! It all went downhill from here. The cards kept being dealt, the soup kept coming, everyone was laughing at my jokes. Who needed food? The cocktail onions and bar peanuts satisfied my hunger. This was turning into a wonderful evening. I noticed that no money was on the table or being exchanged.  I asked Dick about this. “Club rules prohibit playing cards for money.” Whew! Now I was really having fun, realizing that I hadn’t won a single hand all evening.

The club was closing, it was time for us to call it an evening. Everyone got up to leave, shaking hands with me as they left. I decided that I needed to go to the restroom before leaving.  As I emerged back into the grill, the bartender asked, “Mr. Cavanagh, what’s your membership number?” “283,” I said.

I came back to the men’s grill for lunch two days later. As I sat down I looked at the wall behind the bar. I had always Tagsnoticed the large pegboard with hooks and member numbers above each hook. Today, I noticed that five of the member numbers had large stacks of round metal discs on them. I got up and approached the board with some curiosity. What were all the tags doing there? Then my blood ran cold! Each tag had the number 283 written on it. I asked the bartender to explain this to me. “Well, Mr. Cavanagh, you lost big the other night.  Each of the people you lost to now has a tag with your number on their member hook. Actually, lots of tags. Each tag can be redeemed for a drink” Each of my “new friends” had twelve tags with the number 283 on it…50 drinks!!!! I was out almost $300. I ran back to Dick’ office. I couldn’t afford $300. Dick told me not to worry.  “It may take you a while, but you can always write off onion soup. Just give me the expense reports.”

This certainly was an interesting world.

Next:  Another “Close But No Cigar.”

Categories: Ad Agency, Automotive, Campbell-Ewald, Corvette, Media Tags: Advertising, Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Chevy Account, Corvette, Fisher Building, GM Building, Harley Earl, The Recess Club, Zora Arkus-Duntov

Adventures In Creativity

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Posted on September 21, 2013

Poor Chevy Nova!  From its humble beginnings as the Chevy II, the Nova found itself being turned into a coat of many colors. In 1970, it was compared to O.J. Simpson. Future events would make this comparison eerily prescient and scary. By 1976, the marketplace had GM positioning the Nova as a “full-size” small car. Succumbing to a tidal wave of corporate hubris, the decision was made to make a commercial comparing the Nova to Mercedes Benz. The Nova had a larger wheelbase than the MB 230!!!!! Why would anyone want to pay all of that money for a BavariaMercedes when they could buy a Chevy Nova with a larger wheelbase (one inch) for thousands less? No more comparing ourselves to Japanese cars, we were going after the Germans! And what better way to demonstrate the Nova superiority than to film it speeding along the German autobahn and cruising the mountains of Bavaria. We were going to Germany! Well, at least the agency producer and art director were. My job was going to be trying to clean up the nightmare that this commercial was going to become.

Chevy’s Small Car Advertising Manager, and my client, was Tom Boyle. He had done time on the agency side and knew what went on behind the green curtain. From the get-go, he had opposed doing this spot, but had been out-voted by the big-brains at corporate. One of Tom’s first questions to me was, “Are we going to have to go to the expense of shipping a Nova over to Germany for this thing?” I assured him that I had been told we would be able to find the appropriate vehicle in Germany. Wrong! I had to go back to Tom and tell him that we were going to have to ship THREE vehicles to Germany. Rather than beat me to death with his Chevy coffee mug, he just shook his head and chuckled, “Here we go!” Of course, rather than shipping the cars via ocean freighter, the vehicles had to be air shipped to stay on the shoot schedule.over_budget_pic Of course, the production company hadn’t gotten the appropriate customs certificates so the vehicles were impounded at the Munich airport. Of course, this meant that the crew had to sit on their heels for almost a week while we frantically tried to get the vehicles released. Of course, I had to tell Tom all of this good news. Each time I visited him, I held a revised budget in my sweaty, trembling hands. After signing the fourth budget revision, Tom said, “Look, this thing can’t be saved. At least, let’s enjoy the craziness.  You told me about a sushi bar that’s just opened out near the GM Tech Center. Every time you have a budget revision for me to sign, let’s go there for lunch.” We ate a lot of sushi in the next few weeks. Finally, the commercial was done. Tom and I watched the rough cut. After it was over, we looked at each other. Except for the announcer and the oom-pah-pah music, the footage looked like a curvy stretch of I-96 between Lansing and Muskegon, MI. The commercial was now done and scheduled to go on the air in three weeks.  What else could go wrong? A few days later, I was sitting at home watching Charlie’s Angels when I saw a new Ford Granada (a Nova competitor) commercial   My blood ran cold! My home phone began ringing.  I already knew who it was. I answered the phone.  “Hi, Tom. Yeah I saw it. Yeah, they shot a commercial in Bavaria too. Yeah, they compared themselves to Mercedes. Yeah, you could see King Ludwig’s castle in the background so you knew that they were actually there. Yeah, they even had some guy speaking German in it. Hey, you up for sushi tomorrow?”

Let’s just say that our “Germany” spot had a limited run. Who knew? There were still market segments to be exploited. I suggested that they not go Hispanic with  the Nova. There was that “name” thing. For those of you who don’t know yet, Chevy Nova in Spanish can mean “Chevy Won’t” or “Chevy Doesn’t Go.” When I was still the LA guy, we talked Chevy into producing a Chevy Monza spot for the Hispanic market. It was a spot full of aspirational, familial, lifestyle stuff.  Chevy’s Ad Director at the time said he “didn’t get it.” “Where’s the mention of rack and pinion steering and the wheel opening molding plastic chrome accents?” So much for Hispanic Bra BurningMarketing. What about marketing to women? Those Germaine Greer and Gloria Steinem chicks had women all riled up.  Maybe they would get more of a say into the car buying decision than just choosing the color. It was worth a try.  We could make the Nova anything for anybody. We’d make an ad that “appealed to women!” We came up with a layout that everyone agreed was spot on. It would be an interior shot of the Nova with a woman behind the steering wheel, dressed in Chanel and a big hat that looked like an orange juicer, who was looking across the front seat at the reader. Long white gloves were draped next to her on the front seat. The headline read, “Elegance, Style, Nova.” The late, great David E. Davis, former Creative Director at Campbell-Ewald, would call these “Modess Because” ads.  If you’re old enough, you’ll get it.  If you’re not, I’m not going to explain it here except to say their ads featured a woman standing next to a piano, open window, fountain, horse, grand staircase, or museum art piece.  She would always be dressed elegantly, and the headline would simply say “Modess…Because.” We ran the ad in our magazine buy of “women’s magazines.” The mother of four kids who is about to lose it, definitely forced her husband to buy a Nova after she saw our ad in Family Circle. I’m sure the ad was very successful.

A few weeks later, we decide that we needed to give Monza sales a push. Time for some new magazine ads. The request for creative to develop ad concepts was ironically called a CPR…a Creative Planning Request. They came up with eight layouts. We, along with the client, had to choose two. The Chevy Ad Department showed up en masse. Various Campbell Ewald Creative Poo-bahs were there along with three account people…the Car Management Supervisor, the Car Account Supervisor, and the guy to blame (me), if the meeting was a fiasco. After about an hour of hemming and hawing, mumbling, opinion reversals, and heavy breathing, we had chosen only one of the layouts to go forward. Now came the part of a creative presentation where everyone felt compelled to start picking the fly poop out of the pepper. They were now parsing punctuation! The visual of one of the ads appealed to me.  It was a photograph of a driver smiling as he ran the Monza up a winding mountain road. The headline read: Chevy Monza…It Puts The Fun Back In Driving.  Borrrrring! I foolishly thought that since I was in the meeting, I should open my mouth and give an opinion. The Chevy clients were getting upset at not being able to find a second ad to approve. That’s when I opened my mouth.  “Hey guys,” I said, “driving a Monza is more than just having fun, it’s about the pure excitement of going Monza revfast on twisty roads. Instead of saying that it puts the fun back in driving, why don’t we say it puts the “driving” back in driving?” Chevy Monza…It Puts The Driving Back In Driving! The clients loved it! The meeting was a wonderful success. Lots of back slapping and gemülichkeit as they left the room. I was feeling pretty darn good about myself, when I felt a hand grab my shoulder and turn me around. It was one of the Associate Creative Directors. “Never, ever, open your mouth and shout out a creative idea at a meeting.  You make us look bad. Tell us the idea later.” Mysteriously,  the ad never ran. Note to self: Your job on a shoot is to sit next to the Craft Services table, and in a creative meeting your job is to keep your mouth shut.

Next: I Dodge A Big Bullet

 

Categories: Ad Agency, Advertising, Automotive, Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Chevy Nova, Monza Tags: Advertising, Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Chevrolet Chevy II / Nova, Chevy Account, David E. Davis, Ford Granada, General Motors, Germaine Greer, Germany, Gloria Steinem, Mercedes Benz, Monza, Nova

You’re Here To Do What?????

2 Comments
Posted on September 4, 2013

 

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Ahhhhh, the magic of Hollywood! Where dreams become reality, and things aren’t quite what they seem. Chevy was still sponsoring the NBC Sunday Night Mystery Movie. McMillan & Wife, McCloud, and Columbo had become breakout hits. My brother was coming out from Detroit to visit me in Los Angeles. He asked if we might be able to go see a television show being shot.”Of course,” I said, being “connected” with NBC/Universal. “We’ll go watch them film an episode of Columbo. Fortunately for me, Columbo was shooting during my brother’s visit. I had our Head of Network call NBC to set it up. On the appointed day, my brother and I drove to the main gate at Universal. Reading from his clipboard, the guard said, “Yes, Mr. Cavanagh, that will be sound stage 19.  Here is your parking pass.” My brother was impressed. Enough, I hoped, to forgive me for mercilessly picking on him when we were little kids. We got to the sound stage and I introduced myself to the unit production manager who was expecting us. Two director’s chairs had been set up for us just to the right of the set.

The episode being shot was called “Swan Song.” The guest star for this episode was Johnny Cash.  He was playing a philandering country music televangelist (sorry for being redundant) named Tommy Brown.  Tommy’s wife (Ida Lupino) had caught him in flagrante with a choir member and was blackmailing him. Tommy, a pilot, comes up with a solution.  While flying with both ladies, he drugs them and then dons a parachute he’d stashed under his seat. He bails out and watches as the plane crashes and his problems disappear. Well, almost.  Detective Columbo gets suspicious.

The shot that day was to be a recording studio where Tommy was recording the spiritual “I Saw The Light.” The director was the late Nick Colasanto, who went on to play “Coach” on Cheers. In the script, Lt. Columbo walks in,Coach interrupts the session, and asks a few questions. My brother was ready to see the magic being made. For those of you who haven’t had the pleasure, watching a movie or episodic TV show being filmed is as exciting as anxiously watching fingernails grow. After forty minutes of playing with the lights, the camera was ready to roll. “Cue the music!” A pre-recorded tape of “I Saw The Light” began playing.  “Action!” The musicians pretended to be playing.  Johnny Cash started lip synching along. Columbo was supposed to enter through an EXIT door on the right side of the set. Where was Columbo? Peter Falk was patiently waiting on the other side of the door. A small red light next to him was his cue to enter the room. The light was burnt out. “Cut!!” Twenty minutes later the light was replaced.  “Action!” Everything cranked up again. This time Columbo made his entrance too soon. There was a short in the red light’s wiring that caused it to go off. “Cut!!” That was fixed. “Action!” Johnny Cash accidentally knocked over a music stand. “Cut!!” This time everything worked. “Cut!” “OK,” Nick said, “Johnny, I want you to look a little more nervous when Peter comes in.” “Action!!” We were up to Take 37 when my brother turned to me, “Uhh, is this all there is? How much of this will be in the show?” I told him maybe a minute. His face fell. The crew was breaking for lunch. “Is it OK if we go now?” he asked.

My brother, a husky fellow, walked out of the sound stage with me into the very bright, smog-diffused, Southern California sun. He was wearing a black suit, white shirt, and a thin black tie. He also was sporting a black moustache. He had Cannonjust put his sunglasses on when a Universal Studios Tour Tram started to roll by.  Everyone on the tram started screaming and waving at my brother. Had he left his fly open? I turned to look back at him. In the bright sun, and with the sunglasses, he was an exact replica of William Conrad who, at the time, had a hit detective drama on CBS called Cannon. “Quick,” I said, “start waving at them and give them a “thumbs-up” sign.  When he did, the solar flare of white light from over 80 Kodak Instamatic Flashcubes igniting simultaneously almost blinded us. As the tram pulled away, we heard shouts of “We love you Cannon!” Right now, my brother’s picture graces dozens of mantles throughout Iowa.

They say that the only true joy is a child’s joy.  The child has no idea that the happiness might end. So it was with my tenure as the Southern California Regional Account Executive. I hadn’t told anyone other than my wife, but, I had no intention of trying to get back to work for Campbell-Ewald in Detroit. During the summer of 1975, I met a fellow named Bob Albright.  Bob had worked for the LA office of Campbell-Ewald a number of years earlier.  He was now working  for the agency handling Toyota.  We became good friends. As much as we could, we would trade intel about the SoCal car biz.  He would stop by our office to see old friends, and pick me up for lunch. Our Summer Field Meeting was coming up in about a week when Bob showed up at my office. Hmmm.  I didn’t have a lunch scheduled. My secretary, Ilene, showed Bob into my office with the commanding view of Hollywood, and the LA Basin. Bob had a big smile on his face. We started with general chit-chat. Had I forgotten a meeting that we’d set? He asked, “When are you 15374505-close-up-of-a-businessman-experiencing-a-heart-attackheading back to Detroit?” I said, “Probably Sunday night.  The Field Meetings start bright and early Monday morning.” Bob laughed nervously. “No,” he said, “when are you moving back there?” “Bob, I have no intention of moving back to Detroit.” The smile had left his face. “But Tom, I’m here to take your place!”  “You’re here to do what????” I croaked. Perhaps it was my inability to get on my feet to strangle him, or the grotesque visage my face had become, or the frantic clutching at the stabbing pain in my chest, or maybe the fact that I was about to pass out. Bob quickly figured it out…I knew nothing of this. “Well, this is awkward,” he said.  “Maybe I’d better leave,” as he headed for the door. Ilene charged into my office, sobbing.  “You S.O.B.!!! You said that you’d tell me if you were ever going to leave.  Mr. Byrne was here for 17 years.  I’m not used to change like this.” Neither was I.

I pulled myself back into my chair and called Bill Fay.  Bill was the Director of Field Operations and one of those great guys who also had a keen prevarication radar. “Bill, what the HELL is going on?  Bob Albright was just here to tell me he’s the new LA Field Guy.” The earpiece on my phone exploded.  “Damn,” he said. “I’ll call you right back.” A ray of hope? A glint of light? A call from the governor at 11:59 PM? About ninety seconds later my phone rang. A still-teary Ilene informed me that it was Dick O’Connor, Vice Chairman of Campbell-Ewald on the phone. “Hey Tommy,” he said. This was not a good beginning. “Boy, did we screw up on this one. A great example of the right hand not knowing what the left hand was doing. Tom, we want you back here in Detroit.  You’ll be working in the Chevrolet Merchandising Department here, handling, among other things, Sports Marketing for Chevy. You’re going to be a key member of our Chevy Account Team.” “But, Dick, what if I don’t want to come back to Detroit?” I asked naively. “That’s OK,” Dick said. “You can stay in LA if you want.  You just won’t have a job there. You do have one here.” “Oh, since you put it that way, I guess I’ll choose employment,” I said. I was still to come in for the Field Meeting to give my California Marketing Plan reports, which everyone always thought were inflammatory and “pro-import.” A few days later, when I stepped off of the elevator into the 4th floor Campbell-Ewald lobby, I saw the giant “Our Men In The Field” poster.  My picture had already been replaced with Bob’s.

Next:  They Take My Free Car!

Categories: Ad Agency, Advertising, Automotive, Campbell-Ewald, LA, Television Tags: Advertising, Campbell-Ewald, Cannon, Chevy Account, Columbo, Hollywood, Johnny Cash, Los Angeles, Peter Falk

I Visit Sin City

1 Comment
Posted on August 23, 2013

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The Las Vegas of 1974 bears little resemblance to the Las Vegas of today. In 1974, there were still plenty of vacant lots along The Strip. You could walk out of the front door of Caesar’s Palace and see all the way to McCarran Airport.  You knew you were in the desert, because you could see it all around you.  I wasn’t complaining, though. For a Detroit boy still getting used to LA, Las Vegas was like visiting Fantasyland at Disneyland.  Las Vegas was a market that fell within the LA Chevy Zone territory. At the time, there were two Chevy dealers there.  I had asked the LA Zone if Hawaii was part of their territory.  That was a sore subject.  Someone at GM had decided that the Hawaii dealers should be handled by General Motors Oversees Operations…GMOO. For some reason, Hawaii was considered a non-US market. GMOO’s agency was McCann-Erickson…they called on Hawaii.  No problem! LA, San Diego, Palm Springs, and Las Vegas were all mine!!

Every year, the National Automobile Dealers Association holds a convention. Dealers representing all manufacturers, and from every part of the country meet to visit the trade show, go to “make meetings” where thy got to yell at car company management, and are wined and dined by these same manufacturers. This year, the convention was going to be in Las Vegas.  At the time, it was the second largest convention to be held in Vegas. Most manufacturers were large enough to take over an entire hotel.  Chevy had taken over Caesar’s Palace. You knew it was the Chevy hotel by the huge banner hanging on the side of the building, and the three new Chevrolet models they had parked in the fountain.  For those of you who have never been, attending an NADA convention is like going to a four-day Black Sabbath concert where everyone there is much richer than you will ever be, and if you fall Harry+James+-+The+Hits+Of+Harry+James+-+LP+RECORD-441935Sheenasleep, you might get killed.  In an attempt to appease both God and Mammon that year, the featured speakers at the convention were Bishop Fulton J. Sheen, who had a down-to-earth religious show on the old Dumont Network in the 50s, and Harry James, trumpeter and big band leader from he 40s. He had been married to Betty Grable.  I don’t think they were old drinking buddies.

I was sent there to “work.”  Wink, wink.  One of my tasks was to help with the entertainment at the big receptions Chevy put on for their dealers; one on Saturday night, one on Sunday night.  Saturday’s guest entertainer was Glen GlenCampbell.  Chevy flew him in on a private jet, kept the jet’s engine’s running while they whisked him to the grand ballroom at Caesar’s Palace, brought him up on stage, pointed him toward the audience, then whisked him back to the airport after his 40 minute set was over. My job was to make sure the ballroom doors were closed during the performance, lest some wondering Ford dealers try to see a free show.  Sunday night’s entertainment was the Johnny Mann Stand Up and Cheer group. I guess Chevy was still buying its way out of the syndicated TV mess. At the entrance door both nights were a Zone rep, and someone from the hotel.  They each held counters to tally the number of people who came in. I was told that every person walking through the door cost Chevy $45, the per head price for unlimited booze, giant shrimp, baby lamb chops, gourmet cheese, and fettuccine with a mystery white sauce. Twenty-four hundred people the first night, seventeen hundred the second.  Once the shows had ended, I was on my own. Unfortunately, at my tender age, I didn’t know about all the fantastic parties the magazines put on during NADA.  These will be discussed more intimately in future posts.

After filling my pockets with giant shrimp and cheeses, and carrying two giant Jack Daniels roadies, I left the relative sanity of the ballroom, and began my descent into the mailström. My eyes and tender nature were not prepared for what I beheld as I entered the casino. Hundreds of rich millionaires were participating in the tribal rite of those with too much money.  Heads thrown back, they laughed at their good fortune, or perhaps, the 451px-Maelstrom-Clarkegas brought on by the mystery white sauce. Cigar smoke made the casino look like LA during a Level 3 Smog Alert. A very corpulent middle-aged dealer was staggering his way down an aisle of blackjack tables. Clutching tightly to his arm was his niece. I guess she was poor, because it was obvious that she couldn’t afford any underwear.  The tables were all packed.  The dealer stopped at an empty table and inquired why nobody was there.  “Sir, this is a $1000 minimum bet table.”  The Chevy dealer took the bait.  “C’mon, Honey, I’m going to show you how real men gamble. I’m going to bet a wad on one hand. He reached into his pants and pulled out an envelope.  In it was $15,000. He put it on the table.  The dealer counted it and said, “Change for $15,000.”  A pit boss, who looked eerily like Abe Vigoda, came over, looked at the money, looked at the dealer and his niece, and nodded to the blackjack dealer. The blackjack dealer counted out, and then pushed a stack of chips resembling the Chicago skyline to the dealer.  The dealer pushed the Jackchips back on the “Bet” mark on the table.  By now, a crowd had gathered, like hyenas to an injured zebra colt. Everyone was cheering the man on. The blackjack dealer shuffled the cards and held out the green “cut” card. “Go ahead baby, you’re my lucky charm tonight.” The black jack dealer threw two cards to the Chevy dealer, and two cards to himself. The house showed a queen of spades up. The dealer slowly rolled the edges of his two cards  up.  A queen of clubs, and a two of diamonds! “Farg!” he shouted. He didn’t really say farg.  Beads of sweat began to form on his forehead. Maybe betting $15,000 on one hand wasn’t such a great idea. He briefly wondered to himself if Caesar’s Palace allowed “Hey, on second thought, I’ll just take my money and go to my room” Probably not. His corpulent hand made a fluttering motion over his cards. “Sir, you want another card?” the blackjack dealer asked. “Yes,” the man croaked. It came floating off the top of the shoe and landed in front of the man. A king of hearts. The house’s hole card was a seven of spades. BUST!!!!         

Silence enveloped everyone within 30 feet of the table. The Chevy dealer just stared straight ahead. His niece slowly extricated her arm from his and slipped away to find a new uncle. The hyenas had caught scent of a new tragedy. Two dealers were skinny dipping in the fountain. They headed for the entrance. I went back to my room and emptied my pants of shrimp and cheese. Something told me not to touch any of it.

The next morning, as I checked out, I noticed the Stand Up and Cheer folks arguing with the front desk. Apparently the Amex card of their road manager had bounced. The hotel wasn’t allowing them to leave until their $4300 bill had been paid. Hmmm.  I’m here to help the entertainment,  I’ll see what I can do. Suddenly feeling an urge to, at least partially, emulate the poor Chevy dealer of the previous evening, I stepped to the head of the line. “What seems to be the problem?” I said. “They won’t let us check out,” the singers said in unison. “No problem,” I said, “I’m with Chevy’s ad agency and I’ll help you out.” I pulled out my brand new Amex card and tossed it to the desk clerk. He ran it. I waited. Would I “Bust?” Suddenly, he smiled.  “Thank you Mr. Cavanagh, it’s been accepted. They’re free to leave now.” I was crushed by slaps on the back and hugs from well-scrubbed American youth.  The road manager gave me his card. “Send us the bill at our production office and we’ll cut a check for you.”  I did.  They did…eight weeks later.  Amex was not happy with me. I was starting to lose interest in Las Vegas.

Next: Power Politics

 

Categories: Ad Agency, Advertising, Automotive, Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Las Vegas, Los angeles Tags: Advertising, Caesar's Palace, Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Chevy, Chevy Account, General Motors, Las Vegas, NADA, National Automobile Dealers Association

My First Field Meeting

2 Comments
Posted on August 7, 2013

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I was planning on making a dealer call on Euphoria Chevrolet in Skiatook, OK, to see if the corn really did grow as high as they said it did, when I got the memo!!  It was time for the annual Field Meeting of all the Regional Account Managers.  This was exciting on several levels:

  • I was going to be able to see my folks
  • I was going to be able to see the new 1973 Chevrolet ads
  • I was going to be able to fly to Detroit First Class!  Back then they let us fly First Class if the flight was longer than three hours.  KC to Detroit was 2 hours and 45 minutes, but I included the time it took to drive to the airport.
  • I was going to be able to finally meet all the field guys face to face.
  • I was going to be able to get out of driving to Skiatook, OK.

We were all being put up at the beautiful Hotel St. Regis, right across from the GM Building.  This was New Center swank at it’s poshest. The rooms even had these things called St Regismini-bars.  The food was good, and they had a cozy cocktail lounge.  The decor was tres French. One of the restaurant’s most delicious entrees was their “Chicken Poulet.” Apparently, the chef didn’t think that the GM clientele would realize that the entree translated to “Chicken Chicken.”  But remember, this is the same city that gave us “Pizza Pizza!”

Kindly Roy Webb was in charge of the 4th Floor Conference Room.  This was the room where the new ads were presented to clients. Where the media budgets were approved (this year topping an obscene $1.1 million!). The room where changes in management were announced and dignitaries were received.  This is where we would have our Field Meeting.  In addition to running the 16mm AND 32mm projectors, Roy had recently been trained in the operation of the new-fangled videotape machine.  He also served as the concierge for the room.  Pop (yes, pop), coffee, and tea were on tables at the back of the room.  At each place at our table we found: a sharpened pencil, a pad of paper, a pack of Doublemint gum, a pack of cigarettes, a book of matches, and an ashtray.  All neatly arranged.  It didn’t get much better than this. Let the games begin.

Before they did, I must inject some retrospective.  It is part of the human condition to unconsciously assimilate at least some of your surrounding environment. Americans living in London for a period of time will begin saying “shedule” when the word is “schedule.” A waiting line becomes a queue. Easterners in Texas start wearing cowboy hats  In LA, flip-flops and shorts.  So it was in Kansas City.  In the evening, people would “walk the Plaza,” dressed in fine style.  The current style made us all look like characters from “Mary Poppins.”  Very chic.  Just not in Detroit. The morning of the first day of meetings, I showed up in my Kansas City finest; dark blue crushed velour suit, red and blue tattersall shirt, Red Bow tieand a bright red butterfly bow tie.  To top of the look, I was wearing my new prescription glasses with the oversized aviator frames and adjust-a-tint lenses.  Under the bright glare of the conference room lights, it appeared that I was wearing sunglasses.  I walked up behind Dick O’Connor, the Account Director and head of the Chevrolet business at Campbell-Ewald, to say “Hello.”  I tapped him on the shoulder, “Hi, Dick.”  He turned around. “Hi, Tom,” he began, as his smile dissolved into something resembling the face one makes when seeing a dead body for the first time.  “Quite a get-up you’re wearing today.”  Uh oh!!  It wasn’t more than a year or two later that I was walking down a corridor in the GM Building with a friend who worked for GM.  He was wearing a blue blazer, white shirt, red tie, and gray slacks. He was stopped by the Chevy National Sales Manager.  “Son, you’re out of uniform,” he barked. “At GM we wear either a navy blue suit, a gray suit, or a brown suit.”  Uh oh!!!

By the end of our first day, we had been duly proselytized to the true faith of the 1973 products and ads.  We knew things the dealers and Chevy Field Staff wouldn’t know for weeks.  Knowledge was power!  And, love was in the air.  Rather, LUV was in the air.  The small Toyota and Datsun 1/2 ton pickups were eating up the youth market.  In an effort to grab some of these sales, Chevy and Ford resorted to a tried and true Luv3automotive marketing trick: If you can’t beat them, sell their products with your logo on them until you can design and build your own.  Ford began importing trucks from Mazda and selling them as Ford Couriers.  Chevy turned to Isuzu and imported a truck Chevy called the LUV…for Light Utility Vehicle.  Red-blooded Amerkins who wouldn’t be caught dead in an import, happily bought up Couriers and Luvs.  There were other guests at the St. Regis that evening in addition to the “account men” of the Campbell-Ewald Field force.  Isuzu Motor Ltd.had sent a group of executives from Japan to Detroit to finalize the LUV Truck program. Many of them were staying on my floor.

After we’d finished dinner, and drained the cocktail lounge, I went up to my room to go to bed.  I watched the Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour and soon fell asleep.  I thought I was having a dream where a woman was screaming, maybe being attacked.  I wasn’t dreaming.  A woman was screaming…and a second one was moaning loudly.  They were in the room next to me.  I could hear male voices.  They were laughing.  The screaming woman was now moaning loudly, the moaning woman was now laughing.  I had to call the police!  Suddenly, the active crime scene moved into the hallway, right next to my door.  I could her the women running down the hall.  Then I heard the men run after them.  Were they going to finish them off?  Then I heard the women run by my door again.  Again, the men followed after. Now they were all…laughing? Making sure that all the lights in my room were turned off, I carefully peered through the peephole in my door.  The mystery was solved.  The BigsIsuzu executives, now clad only in their tighty-whities, were chasing two “sidewalk hostesses” who had been apparently hired for an evening of “pillowing” and general tomfoolery.  Having finished ACT I in the room, they were now playing what seemed to be “Red Rover, Red Rover, send Matsumoto right over.”  I guess they were just trying to help with the balance of trade problem. I banged on my door and went back to bed.

Next:  Hills That Is. Swimmin’ Pools. Movie Stars 

Categories: Ad Agency, Advertising, Automotive, Campbell-Ewald Tags: Chevrolet, Chevy Account, Field office, General Motors, Kansas City, New Center Detroit

Are We Going To Crash?

1 Comment
Posted on August 2, 2013

Jet Bomber Airplanes B-52 Stratofortress Combo

Omaha was one of the Chevy zone offices serviced out of Kansas City.  The zone would order an extra 1,000 red Impalas with white vinyl roofs, slap a University of Nebraska medallion on the grill, and easily wholesale every single one to the dealers in the zone.  We’d provide “Big Red One” ad materials to support the promotion. Dick Novotny was the Zone Merchandising Manager, and one of the nicest clients I ever had.  I flew up to Omaha to attend the promotion kick-off meeting.  Dick picked me up at the airport and took me to my hotel. “Don’t make dinner plans,” he said.  “I’m picking you up and taking you to dinner at my house. My wife and daughters are preparing a BBQ for us.”  !!!!!!!  This was a first!  

We had a wonderful time at dinner.  Grilled Omaha steaks, corn on the cob, and blueberry cobbler.  I was really starting to love this job.  Dick told me that he had been a B-17 bombardier during WW II and his love of flying had encouraged him to get his pilot’s license.  He got it in 1968.  On our leaving, he asked if we make a stop. The FAA was holding a ground school class that evening, and he’d like to attend.  I agreed to join him, thinking that this would be a good way to digest my meal. Screen Shot 2013-08-01 at 1.55.19 PM That evening I learned everything there was to know about “wake turbulence.”  Wake turbulence is the aerodynamic phenomenon that causes twin tornadoes of turbulence to stream out of the tips of the wings of a plane in flight.  This violently churning air extends about 5 miles behind and 900 feet below any large plane, e.g., DC-10, 747, etc.  The instructor showed videos of small planes being caught in the vortex.  They were tossed around like a terrier shaking a rat.  Note to self: stay away from wake turbulence.

Dick dropped me off and told me that he’d pick me up in the morning for our drive to see dealers in Grand Island. The next morning we only got as far as Millard Airport, a small facility outside of Omaha.  He pulled up to a two-seater Cessna. “Tom, it’s too pretty to drive to Grand Island today.  We’re going to fly.” Hmmmmm. Oh well, he said he had a license.  The first thing I noticed after I had strapped myself in was that the view out of the cockpit windshield was quite different from the view out of my free car.  I couldn’t see the runway, only the tops of tress in the distance and a lot of sky.  Once we were airborne, things leveled out. It was like an oversized ferris wheel.  We flew over vast farms, countless cattle, and we buzzed the poor inhabitants of Boys’ Town. Dick said, “Why don’t you take over? Have you ever flown a plane?”  Uhh, no.  Dick took his hands off the yoke and folded his arms.  I was able to unlock my fingers that had been holding the bottom of my seat in a death grip.  I lunged toward the yoke and grabbed it as hard as IStuka could. Of course, my sudden action threw us into a steep dive.  To the casual observer on the ground, we must have looked like a Stuka beginning a dive bomb attack on a hapless herd of Herefords.  Dick grabbed the yoke and pulled us out of the dive milliseconds before the wings were ripped off.  “Tom, you have to relax.  These things almost fly themselves.”  He turned us around, and set our course for Grand Island and the Chevy dealers waiting to start making thousands of dollars selling their Big Red Ones.

Once Dick had returned us to an even keel (sorry to mix the metaphor here) he turned the controls back over to me.  “Just let the plane fly itself.  We’re on a straight line to Grand Island.  Keep the artificial horizon level, and stay on this course.”  Piece of cake.  Dick busied himself with some paperwork, I was busy looking at the expanse of Nebraska below me.  I was feeling pretty sure of myself.  “Hello folks, this is the captain speaking.  I’ve turned off the seat belt sign…you are free to move about the cabin. We do ask that while in your seat, you keep your seatbelts fastened.  The flight attendants will be coming through the cabin serving lots of liquor and cigars.”  Far off to our right I saw what appeared to be a huge airport.  It was Offutt Air Force Base.  At the time, it was the headquarters for the Strategic Air Command, and home to several B-52 Stratofortress bomber wings.  Off to our left I could see Lincoln, Nebraska.  This sure beat driving to Grand Island.  Ahead of us I could see…the rear end of a B-52 flying about two miles in front of us.  Hmmmm.  Didn’t I just hear something about small planes being behindPilot big jets?  I asked Dick, “Should we be worried about wake turbulence?”  “Why?” he asked, not looking up from his papers.  “Because of that,” I said, point to the large bomber butt beginning to fill our windshield.  “Oh shnikey!!!!” he screamed.  He really didn’t say shnikey. He grabbed the controls.  Too late!  We were suddenly flying upside down, and all I could see was ground, air, ground, air, ground, vomit, ground, air.  The B-52’s wake was having its way with us.  Lights and buzzers were going off on the instrument panel.  The whole plane started shuddering.  Slowly, as the giant, olive drab leviathan moved away, Dick was able to regain control of the plane.  The cockpit was filled with silence and the faint aroma of urine.

He turned the plane around.  We were headed back to Millard Airport.  Mr. Tom’s Wild Ride was over.  We drove to Grand Island to help the dealers make thousands of dollars.  I think Dick kept flying.  He just never took me along again.

Next: “Sir, Chevrolet will pay for all the damage.”

Categories: Ad Agency, Advertising, Automotive, Campbell-Ewald Tags: Advertising, Campbell-Ewald, Chevy Account, Millard Airport, Nebraska, Omaha, Strategic Air Command

I Am Plucked From The Slough Of Despond

5 Comments
Posted on July 26, 2013

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After the Christmas Party, the Campbell-Ewald Management Training Program returned to its own state of homeostasis.  I was learning a lot, but knew that no department manager was going to turn the controls of the 747 over to me just yet.  I was hanging out in Multi-Products Land.  This was a separate, but equal, area of the agency that handled all the accounts that weren’t Chevrolet.  One of these accounts was Marathon Gasoline.  I enjoyed helping on the account because we had developed a promotion for them with the comic strip character B.C.  This was the brilliant strip about the adventures of the caveman B.C. and his friends.  If you went in to a Marathon station, and purchased eight gallons of gas, you got a B.C. placemat. The next week it was a B.C. coffee mug. Next, a B.C. glass.  Then, a B.C. bowl.  A friend of mine was a traffic person on the account.  We produced the B.C. merchandise for the promotion.  He was able to slip me enough B.C. stuff that I was able to call my fiancee` and tell her we wouldn’t need to register for china or crystal. I had taken care of that.

When the team would go off to a client meeting, I was told, “Tom, why don’t you stay here and hold down the fort while we’re gone.”  That meant that there was nothing to do for the day.  The old saying about idle hands and the devil proved true. On one of my idle days, after I had toured the entire agency introducing myself, I noticed a stat of a mechanical for an outdoor board that had been left on my desk. NOTE: For our readers who weren’t born until Reagan was President, a mechanical was a hard cardboard flat upon which type and artwork were laid to be sent as the finished product to the engraver.  Photostats were made to circulate to parties that needed one more chance to approve the ad.  The Blow Gunstat of an outdoor board mechanical was approximately 30 inches long by 20 inches high.  Most people just folded them twice and put them in a file folder.  Overcome with curiosity I decided to roll it diagonally into a tube; starting with one corner and ending with the corner across from it. It made a tube almost three feet long.  I fastened the end of the roll with a small piece of tape and looked into the tube.  Having folded the stat on the bias, the tube now had rifling on the interior.  Hmmmm.  I needed a bullet. A long-nosed pushpin would do. Unfortunately, the barrel of the tube was a little larger than the pin.  Wait! A handy tissue was trimmed and taped to the push part of the pin to serve as a gasket to maintain pressure.  I loaded the dart.  I needed a target.  Where, where, where? Aha! I spied a metal wastebasket about 25 feet away from me.  After filling my lungs, I emptied them into the end of the rolled-up stat.  I didn’t see the dart leave the tube, but I did hear a distinct clang.  In the blink of an eye, the dart had travelled the 25 feet, and not only hit the wastebasket with deadly accuracy, it had penetrated the metal side and was now sitting inside the basket on a pile of discarded Delco contact reports.  Eureka!!  This technology must be shared…but only with those who appreciate a wasted mind.  If it got into the wrong hands, the halls of the GM Building would run with blood. 

The days continued to roll toward the end of January, 1971, when, one day, I received a call from Jim Berline.  Jim was the Assistant to the Director of Field Operations.  He had come to Campbell-Ewald a number of months before I had.  He wanted to meet for lunch.  I couldn’t imagine what he wanted to talk about.  He was a Wolverine, I was a Spartan. The Hatfields and the McCoys weren’t usually big into social contact.  Jim and I met and had a cordial chat about life, the training program, and the relative merits of advertising as a career choice.  The next day he called, asking me to come to see him in his office.  I came over and he described what his job as Assistant to the Director of Field Operations entailed.  He asked if it sounded interesting to me.  Was I being vetted for something?

The role of the Regional Account Executive at Campbell Ewald was an interesting one. There were ten regional Campbell-Ewald offices.255-418759 One in each of the Chevrolet Regional cities, and one extra in Los Angeles.  The Western Regional office for Chevy was up near San Francisco, but the agency also had an office in Los Angeles to handle the LA and San Diego Zone offices as well as serve as the center for West Coast Operations such as TV production, Network Affairs, starlet management, and to handle the Rockwell account.  Back then, Chevrolet and the agency had no desire to become involved with local Chevy ad associations.  The field office was there to support the region and the zones with their own local promotions, provide production assistance to the local ad association agencies, evaluate the local execution of national Chevy media buys, wine and dine the Chevy field staff (who knew which one would be running Chevrolet in a few years?), and to send weekly reports to the agency on how things were going out in the colonies. There were two types of Regional Account Executives: the first was the up-and-comer who had been sent to the field to learn the client’s business, and would be brought back to Detroit to be part of the National account team; and, the lifer category of fellow who had the job so dialed in that he knew (much to his delight) that neither Chevrolet nor Campbell-Ewald would ever want him transferred to Detroit. During this era, it was generally felt that field experience was necessary for ascendancy within the Chevrolet Account hierarchy. The “field guy” reported to the Director of Field Operations in Detroit, so he was pretty much his own boss.  He had a generous expense account.  He got to make his own schedule.  He had his own secretary. And…wait for it, wait for it.  He got a free car every year!!!!!!!

I told Jim, “Where do I sign up?”  We went next door to see his boss.  Gene Owens was the Director.  A wonderful man who looked like he could be your uncle.  The three of us chatted for a while, and the curtain was pulled back.  I was sworn to secrecy.  The Dallas field guy was leaving the agency.  Jim was being moved to Dallas and needed to be replaced here in Detroit ASAP.  I was being considered for the job. This meant that I could be out of the training program and into a position that would officially mark the start of my career.

rapture3Gene called the next day. Commencing the following Monday, I would be the new Assistant to the Director of Field Operations on the Chevrolet Account at Campbell-Ewald. My salary rocketed to $11,400 a year! I had “crossed over.” Press releases announcing the promotion were sent to the Detroit News, The Detroit Free Press, and the New Center News.  A fatted calf was prepared for the feast that was to be held in my honor.  I could afford my own apartment.  Life was good.

Next:  “Ummmm, Do You Mind If I Get Married First?

         

Categories: Ad Agency, Advertising, Automotive, Campbell-Ewald Tags: Campbell-Ewald, Chevrolet, Chevy Account, Detroit, Field office

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Predestined!

Narrow eyes, unctuous smile, snazzy clothes, power hair...destined to be an ad guy!

What is a BAG SMASHER????

Bag smasher is short for "baggage smasher," someone who carries someone's else's luggage. It was something of derogatory term applied to account executives ("suits") who were a little too eager to suck up to a client. Fortunately, it is seldom used today.

What am I trying to do?

After over four decades in the advertising business, my brain had run out of room to remember things, e.g., my name, my AOL password, where I left my Metamucil, and where babies come from. I decided I needed to download some of the accumulated slush in my head.

This blog will be a chronological record of what I've been doing since 1968. I'm doing it not to self-aggrandize, but rather to clear some memory in my head so I can find my car keys.

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